Owl That And Mawr

This isn’t the Hell Week update you are expecting, I’m sure. I was leaving my Haverclass last Thursday to catch the Blue Bus back to the Mawr for Hell Week shenanigans when I stepped off the curb and rolled my ankle. I felt/heard something snap, and then I couldn’t really put weight on it, but I just figured I’d sprained it. An ace bandage and some ice, and it’ll be better really soon, right?

I spent the next eight hours with ice and compression, but by the end of the night, it had turned a shade of purple that was too weird to ignore. The amazing McBrides drove me to the Bryn Mawr Hospital ER for x-rays and a real diagnosis. Turns out, I broke my ankle. I am in my vey late twenties, and I have a broken bone. What the heck?!

It has been an endlessly frustrating weekend- really lonely, with a heaping helping of super deep bone pain. I had to miss the Friday festivities because I can’t put any weight on my left ankle. I FaceTimed into bedtime stories, and read to the McB’s, but it wasn’t the same as being there. I don’t have any pictures of my story, because I was on a computer…it was rough. It continues to be rough. I’ve been home since Thursday, keeping up with my readings for class and hobbling around my house trying not to whack the cats with my crutches. Swayze is really scared of them, but really fond of my cast- he keeps head butting it because he thinks it’s a stuffed animal. I’ve woken up the last few days with Swayze asleep  next to my leg, with a paw on the cast. Batman has been the best doctor cat ever, spending most of his time either on me or close enough that he can look over and ensure my safety.

I’m really looking forward to the end of this particular adventure. Underwater basket weaving is today, and I’m sad about missing it, but I think I’ll be back for reconciliation day tomorrow. It’ll be nice to celebrate the end of Hell Week with the McB’s, even though I don’t have hellees of my own. I miss campus, but I’m not super looking forward to trying to get around on crutches when it’s basically one big sheet of ice. I have an appointment with a podiatrist today to determine whether I’ll need surgery, and maybe to get this fiberglass cast off. Wish me luck- the best possible outcome is no surgery and a short recovery time. Ugh.

I had my appointment, and the outcome is right in the middle of best and worst. I don’t need surgery, which is great, but I am not yet in a boot. I have a cast (my first one ever!), I still can’t put weight on it, and the recovery time is 6-8 weeks. The doc said that the fact that I’m strong and active will help with healing. Hey, it could always be worse, right? At least I’ll be walking by graduation. Bonus, the cast makes my already super jacked calves look even bigger! Thanks for being awesome, legs.

I finally finished all of my crafting, got those crafts to where they needed to go, put things in the mail, and made snack plans for Plenary. It’s Hell Week! Today at 5:34, the Taylor Bell rang and we officially welcomed a few newbies into the incestuous McB hell family. I’m so excited to see them through the roller coaster of the next bunch of days!

They successfully completed their scavenger hunt and met us all in Erdman, where their hellers were waiting with schedules, and a big group of us were ready with an absurdly loud anass. Dinner was a whirlwind of schedule reading and planning and questions, interrupted by the occasional serenade or poetic ode. The costumes happened so quickly, too- the bell rang, and mawrtyrs everywhere became master quickchange artists. It’s going to be a good week.

The McB’s have plans to go hard at Shipley, because crashing seems especially inappropriate for us…get ready for pictures of extremely confused dance attendees.

I’ll be posting more frequently on Twitter and Insta, so stay tuned there for Hell Week updates! And a big re-cap will come next week.

Also, pro-tip for first-years- befriend a McB. Most of us (myself excluded) have cars, and we’re pretty sympathetic to the running-in-the-cold part. If you keep it quiet, we’ll give you a ride to the Duck Pond on Saturday morning. <3

As we get deeper into the semester, I am becoming increasingly aware of the fact that this is the end of my time at Bryn Mawr. It’s rough. I’m practicing avoidance, some of the time, and that hasn’t been the best plan. Things keep sneaking up on me (Hell Week is next week, WHAT?!), so I’ve decided to switch gears. I’m taking what I learned in years of theatre (did you know I did that? I did that.) and saying yes to everything. It doesn’t matter what it is. I’m saying yes.

So, this weekend I not only got a lot of homework done, but I left the house and spent time with friends, too. I went to yoga on Saturday morning, and was greeted with open arms by everyone at my home studio. I love it there, and spending time away always clears my head in just the right way. It was a great class, and I felt amazing afterward. I went to brunch afterward, because hey, I had to eat, right? And then I headed out to campus to see the South Asian Students Culture Show! It was seriously amazing. Bryn Mawr is jam packed with talented, wonderful human beings.

I was also able to spend time with my friend Sophia, who I met in ESEM and have stayed really close to. We had a standing lunch date every week last spring, but last semester our schedules kept not lining up. This semester we’re trying hard to get back into it. She also made pictures happen, because after being friends for this long we don’t have any pictures of the two of us! The header of my blog doesn’t count, because you can’t really tell it’s us…

Anyway, whenever we get together, we just talk forever and then go our separate ways, so this time we actually managed to take a few shots. This will be it, probably, until May Day. And Garden Party! I asked her last year to be my Number One Garden Party Girl, and she said yes, and I know I probably asked way too early, but there’s no one else I’d rather have running chairs and tables and hanging decorations and dealing with what kind of snacks my mom is bringing.

She’s the best. Here’s the cutest one- it’s grainy because we were in Goodhart, in the dark! I think we were pretty successful.

On Sunday, I did another giant pile of work, because it just never ends, but finished the week off with a concert! The Wonder Years were playing a series of shows at Union Transfer in Philly, celebrating their 10 year anniversary of being an awesome amazing band, and I went with a friend. It was a crazy good time, filled with all the noise and sweat and dancing and jumping and guitars that I love about rock shows. I have some bruises, but for me, that’s the marker of ticket money well spent. If I keep making concerts part of my regular schedule, every weekend, I may just make it out of my last Bryn Mawr semester alive! We’ll see. Maybe. Alums, what helped you make it through the final stretch?

For me, focusing (especially on the weekends) is all about the pop punk section of playlists on Songza and knowing that my planner is up-to-date. I use a paper organizer and of course, iCal. I’m not ready to put the analog down forever, so I use both. Having two planners going at all times helps me to remember to double check everything, so that I’m never really at risk of forgetting a meeting or an appointment. I do the same thing with my to-do list. I use an app called Wunderlist (which I love, because it reminds me of wanderlust, my most delightfully named affliction) on my phone and my computer, and keep running paper lists of things in my planner, notebooks, syllabi…everywhere. I write everything down.

I know that sounds all over the place, and it kind of is. I like things to happen in very particular ways, but no one in my life would ever call me organized, and I’m probably the only one who understands my methods. I promise, though, it all works. The act of writing things is helpful for getting stuff to actually stick in my sieve-like brain. Without multiple systems at work, I’d never get anything done on time.

Having the best schedule ever for my last semester at the Mothership is helping, too. I only have classes three days a week, and the remainder of the time I’m working on McBride tasks, thesis research, or really important cat cuddling. I’m loving my courses, and I’m not yet feeling like I’m going to murder my thesis topic! I just have to keep it up for another few months. (Ack.)

What helps you focus, Mawrtyrs?

Winter break went by so quickly! Not because I was doing a million and one exciting things and internships and international tours and what have you, but because I had a rough case of the ol’ walking pneumonia for the first three weeks of our time away from classes. The end of finals week hit hard, and then my lungs just shut down. I hate doing nothing, and that’s exactly what I had to do for those weeks. I coughed a lot, and I watched far more episodes of The Simpsons than a person really should.

By the time I felt well enough to do anything, break was almost over. Lucky for me, I’d made a plan to go to Atlantic City with some of the other McBrides! I hadn’t really realized how much I needed to get out of Philadelphia. AC is super close, but by the time we got there, I felt like I was on a totally different planet. (Part of that is how weird I feel about casinos, but that’s for another time.)

We spent two days inside a giant dome, pretending that it wasn’t January and enjoying the sunshine, the warmth of the hot tubs, and a seemingly endless supply of fruity drinks. It was very hard to come home.

I’m never so far away from Bryn Mawr, though. It follows me everywhere. Example: the night my friend MJ asked me about “Moby Dick,” because she’d just started reading it and needed some context. I launched into a lecture, fueled by Strawberry Bellinis, about race and slavery and whaling and disability and the chapters on whale taxonomy that she could maybe skip if she felt herself losing faith in the novel…

Someone took video, and it exists in the internet ether. It was a proud (and silly!) moment. That’s a good combination. I’m working toward more proud, and more silly.

Welcome back Mawrters!

P.S. Oh my gosh, this was my last undergraduate winter break. This is not a thing we can process right now, but come back to me in two weeks, okay?

This weekend I celebrated my 28th birthday the best way I know how- I didn’t do any homework, for all of Saturday. Nothing. I caught up on Scandal, I ordered takeout, and I napped with my cats. It was glorious! My actual birthday was bookended by adventures with some of my West Philly and Bryn Mawr friends. On Friday night we went to Stimulus, one of the larger gay parties in the city, and had a great time. Lots of dancing, lots of strobe lights. I don’t go out super frequently, so going out for my birthday, with people I enjoy, was excellent. Then, on Saturday night, I went to a Friendsgiving feast with the same group of people. I didn’t cook (remember, I did nothing on my birthday!), but I did grab some wine and bring that over. Easy and delicious housewarming gift.

My friendship soulmate, Katie, had asked if I wanted a cake, and I didn’t- I love having a birthday that falls around/on Thanksgiving, because while I don’t love the holiday (violent colonialism!), I definitely love eating my weight in side dishes and pie. So, I said no to a cake, but yes to a bowl of stuffing with candles in it. Here’s a picture of Katie telling everyone to sing!

Then, yesterday, we went to see Mockingjay in the University City theatre. It was great- the theatre wasn’t too crowded, and we got a bunch of dollar candy at the grocery store across the street. I haven’t been to the movies since before the semester started, because it always feels like such a crazy luxury. I’m so glad we went! I’d love to discuss the movie with some more people, because it left me with a pile of feelings that I wasn’t entirely sure how to process.

This week, I’ll be traveling to New York to see my parents and my sister, and eat a second Thanksgiving dinner, and perhaps con my mom into making me an extra pie. Truly, folks, once it gets a little chilly, I just want to eat pie for every meal. Also, my dad is a clown in the Macy’s parade! If you watch it, keep your eyes peeled for a very, very tall bearded skinny guy- he’s apparently a “breakfast clown” this year, but no one knows what that means.

What are your holiday plans? Tell me!

Many of my Facebook friends have taken to posting lists of the things they’re thankful for, and it has been lovely to see a little bit of positivity in my feed. I tend to not post my lists to social media, but I do keep notes in my Slingshot about the good things that have happened every day. President Cassidy just wrote a blog post about gratitude, and how it feels to thank others and receive thanks yourself. She ended the post with a suggestion that we, the campus community, should perhaps try to bring back the lost art of the thank you note. Perhaps it was just a coincidence, but a friend that I’ve been working on getting to know better handed me a letter that same day, and I was blown away by the emotional generosity and kindness of it.

At work, a few years ago, I was brought into a meeting wherein my boss told me that I had really excellent hard skills, but that my soft skills were a little bit lacking. I wasn’t really sure what she meant, because the conversation was held almost entirely in retail managerial parlance, but when I asked for clarification, her answer surprised me. She told me that I needed to be a little less intense when I acknowledged people- that receiving validation or praise from me was like a gift from some kind of higher power, because I was so seriously focused and genuine when it happened. That this was a critique took a little while to sink in, but I eventually realized that what she meant was that saying thank you didn’t always have to be a giant event, and that I could probably loosen up a little and have the same impact.

After that, I worked on thanking at least one person every day, often for tiny things. I know how good it feels to be noticed, and I thrive on that kind of acknowledgement. Lots of folks do. So, sending that vibe out has become one of the things I most love doing- telling the people around me how excellent they are at being themselves, at doing their jobs, at being scholars and activists and friends. After reading KCass’s blog post, and receiving a note this week, I think I’m going to step up my thank you game. Get ready for some handwritten notes, friends.

As promised, here are some photos from the Seven Sisters Conference at Wellesley College. Fun times had by all, including Athena!

This past weekend I had the amazing chance to travel to Wellesley College with a handful of other Bryn Mawr student leaders for the Seven Sisters conference. After some frantic e-mailing and a meeting that was bookended by videos of tiny hamsters eating burritos, we took off on Friday morning for a roughly six hour road trip to Massachusetts.

Wellesley has a student body that is a little more than twice Bryn Mawr’s, and the campus reflected that. Not only is the space stunning (especially with the leaves turning a million different colors), but it’s also huge. Well…comparatively. It’s not Rutgers huge, but it did take a little getting used to. Stay tuned for pictures of our adventuring! We definitely took some amazing group shots that belong in the admissions materials.

On Saturday morning, I attended a workshop on self-care for student leaders. It was incredible- informative, validating, happy. The facilitator talked a lot about the different kinds of self-care, and about going easy on ourselves when we have to say no. More than the maintenance kinds of things (eat, sleep, drink water), this was really specifically geared toward productive changes and healthy ways to deal with stress when it inevitably happens. There was also some focus on harm reduction, which I am a huge fan of generally. I got a lot out of it, and I’m excited to share the things I learned there in my community at Bryn Mawr.

The afternoon breakout sessions were split up by leadership roles, so I was with other “Campus Resource Positions.” Bryn Mawr was unique among the other colleges in that we brought community members (after an application process), rather than just folks on the E-Board. In a stroke of weird Mawrtyr luck, both of the community members (myself included) are above-average involved in SGA, so it worked well for the breakouts. We talked a lot about the Honor Code, and how it works and what confrontation looks like- students from the other colleges were blown away by how much control we have on campus, and the things that students are responsible for without faculty or administration oversight. It was a beautiful experience to explain personal responsibility and buy-in at Bryn Mawr, and have people from other colleges say that they might want to model new policies based around those ideas. We also found a lot of common ground- most of the other colleges have also had racism at the forefront of their campus conversations recently, and it felt useful to be able to talk about those issues and incidents with students from colleges that have similar environments to ours.

I also got to speak with an Ada Comstock Scholar from Smith! Ada’s are the Smith version of McBrides- really similar, except that there are so many more of them on their campus. Smith isn’t that much larger than the Mawr, but they currently have 120 Ada’s on campus! We talked about our struggles with representation and legacy, finances and community support, and I felt like I was talking to a kindred spirit. It was truly lovely to be able to bond in that way with someone who understood the very specific needs of the non-traditional student community.

I’m really excited to be able to move forward from this weekend and use the things I learned, and the connections I made, to create a stronger connection between the Seven Sisters, and on our campus as well. It felt like a real gift to be able to spend the weekend with a bunch of other hyper-involved, passionate, committed students who are working as hard as they can to make their communities better.

Usually I’m not really into this particular holiday- dressing up used to be super fun, but has gotten less so in the past few years, and school is almost always kicked up into high gear right around this time in the semester.

This year, though, I figured out a last minute costume and made it happen. Halloween on a Friday night doesn’t happen very often, and I wanted to make the most of what might be my last Halloween in Philly. The spooky stars aligned, and I embodied Spinelli, cute, kind of aggressive tomboy from the Nickelodeon cartoon “Recess.” Awesome.

Also included, just for kicks, what is probably the best episode of this show- the Ashleys find out that Spinelli’s first name is Ashley, and work to turn her into one of them. The episode includes a killer “Freaks” reference- “One of us! One of us!”

http://youtu.be/cvDxwOvSVE0

Happy Halloween everyone!